This morning, Jaime and I went to Wal-Mart.
(Let me preface this story by saying, I hate Wal-Mart. I think it is filthy and I don't think that their prices are any lower than my cleanly-neighborhood Target.)
Here is a short list of the spectacles that lay waiting this morning:
-- Three employees (all with crimpy hair and extra-long fake nails) standing talking to each other, unable to help us find slickers...then, when they decide to help us, another customer asks where to find lunch boxes. The employee says "I'd help you find them but I'm helping another customer right now" and walks away.
--Two grown men with matching bleached blonde (white-blonde) hair and gold necklaces (oh, and tank tops)
--A man in the optometry section with his hand in his jacket as if he had a gun
Jaime made the trip tolerable:
--Swerving the cart like crazy: "You have to drive your cart like this because these people like Nascar."
--A few minutes in to the shopping trip: "Maybe it's psycho-semantic, but my hands are really itchy."
--When neither of us could find the goggles: "Matt Hall could find them because he actually shops here."
We couldn't get out of there fast enough...and when we did leave, we purchased a small bottle of Purell, so we could de-Mart our hands before drinking our beverages (which we left in the car so they wouldn't collect germs in the store).
*This is a line from "Love is a Good Thing" by Sheryl Crow. They do not sell this CD at Wal-Mart because of this line.
4 comments:
you're such a snob. :) I am too. Why is it that when you walk in to Wal-mart it's like walking into another country, or the midwest. (same thing) Everytime I go to Walmart I ask myself, "where do these people come from??...I mean, do they LIVE in Orange County or do they drive from Riverside to come to THIS Walmart."
I'm such a snob.
I am thinking that their cousins work at the Stater Bros. on El Toro and Trabuco or is it their mothers' brothers' sisters' daughter?!?! Hmmm....I wonder! What time do they have to get up to drive here to work at either place, do they carpool or sleep in their cars, Arkansas (Walmart headquarters) is a LONG way away!
I go to the one in Laguna Niguel and I think the same thing as Alanna: do these people LIVE in Laguna Niguel??
If you really want fun--go on a Saturday night around 8pm. It's packed. (Yes, I guess I was there too)
But I love Wal Mart. I am usually the prettiest and skinniest one in the store.
Don't dis my peeps. They may not all be fashion savvy, or have dental insurance, or social skills (or any skills), but I love The Wal-mart!
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