He Is Faithful

On May 20th, I was supposed to fly to Kenya. On May 18th, my trip was postponed due to terrorists attacks and threats of more attacks. Needless to say, I was heartbroken. I had waited months after buying my plane ticket to even let my heart be excited about going because it felt too good to be true--that after nearly three years of hoping to go back, of hoping to see friends who had become like family, whose families had grown in the years that I have missed...

And two days after I had decided to believe it was really happening, allowed myself to purchase supplies and gifts, we made the tough decision to postpone my trip until November.

Now, I'm already pretty much a crybaby {commercials, a good TV montage, Taylor Swift songs} I consider it a victory when I make it through a full day without crying.

But, this Kenya trip being postponed kinda destroyed me. I laid in bed for two days straight {watching The West Wing and playing 2048.} I cried in the majority of my meetings at work {thankfully, no one was too surprised--see above.} I was a wreck.

My incredible friends and family members did all sorts of things to help ease the pain of the loss of this adventure {even a few off of my 35 by 35, and my 2014 goals!}

May I present to you, in some sort of chronological order, what happened in the weeks of my life that would have been spent in Kenya.

Our High School small group met for the last time until next Fall. My co-leader and I made a paper chain for each girl to count down to the end of the school year.

I was able to fully unpack, decorate my room, and empty the house of all of the boxes that had been strewn about since we moved in!

Cheryl took me and Cathi on a picnic to watch planes arrive at the airport. 

A whole group of us visited the Aquarium of the Pacific and watched as their boys discovered all kinds of marine life.

The following week I took a spontaneous road trip to Oklahoma.

Oh, I also ordered and received this beautiful package from Japan...

...which contained the washi tape to stripe our living room wall!

In the back of my mind, I knew that no amount of adventuring would cure my heartsickness, but I really did want to try...and we made a lot of really fun memories, for relatively little money {!!!} 

Over the six weeks, I have prayed and cried and argued with God over what felt like a direct withholding of my heart's deepest desires by keeping me away from Kenya. Through some honest confession and some difficult times of listening to His voice, and through the rest and refreshment from each of these activities, I have felt God smiling upon me. I have felt comforted and loved and seen by God in ways that I hadn't dared hope for recently. 

It was a really, really tough end of May, but God was and is and will continue to be faithful...even when I am faithless.